Going, going, gone

Whew! It's been an incredibly busy week, and I apologize for my little sebaticle from the blog. My intent was to write every couple of days, but maybe that was a bit ambitious. By the time I wrap up all of the days' needs, it seems I have precious little time to spend with my wife. Mandi is typically not much of a reader, but she loves to listen if I read to her. The day just doesn't seem to close quite right if we don't cap it off with a chapter or two, and that has taken priority rather than blogging. A bit of schedule restructuring might be in order. That said, I have a couple of thoughts which have presented themselves over the past week, but one in particular seems to manifest itself on a nearly daily basis. Allow me to explain:

One of the most fascinating classes I had the pleasure of taking in college was a class called Aging, Death, and Dying. Sounds a little morbid, huh? Apparently my fellow classmates and I thought so, too, as we renamed the class Going, Going, Gone in an attempt to put a lighthearted spin on an otherwise difficult topic. In short, we explored the human aging process and all of the emotions which are inevitably tied to death, and held many a discussion on our individual views of the topic. The recent passing of a close family friend has me revisiting some of these questions and closely observing some of our practiced cultural rituals. The question which plagues me revolves around our cultures overwhelming insistence on viewing death as a negative and mournful event. Even the very word "funeral" just sounds creepy and dark, and when I go to one and find the majority of those in attendance dressed in black, it seems to create an overall depressing and sad atmosphere. But why? Why are we so bent on creating and enhancing this atmosphere? I'm sure there is a fraction of folks who just follow the norm and probably don't give much thought to it, but that's why I'm here - to question such norms!

Please don't misunderstand me; I am well aware there is a very normal and expected time of mourning following the death of family and friends. I'm not discouraging that, nor would I ever think such mourning is out-of-place. Rather, I believe it to be very healthy and necessary, and the time of mourning, or how long it lasts, is different for eveyone. I reiterate that I understand all of these elements. My questions centers around a shift from the thought of a funeral to more of a memorial service, or even a celebration of life. Lots of people have memorial services these days, but the overall dress, per my observances, has still been the dark and sad theme. Can we shift to more of a celebration-of-life-type thinking?

Personally, I am excited to attend a celebration of life as I consider myself very blessed to have known the person whom I am celebrating. The only element of this life we can be absolutely sure of, is that we will die. Death may not come in the exact way we would like it to, but that's usually not our decision to make. (I know this very statement can lend itself to a huge discussion in and of itself, but I'm not trying to write a book here, so I digress.) Can we have our period of mourning, yet celebrate the life of the person we are mourning at the same time? Can we come to a place where it's appropriate to dress in a happy fashion while we observe and remember the deceased?

For the record, my wife is well aware of the bash I want thrown when my time on earth is finished. Lots of beer, lots of laughter, lots of fun! I have requested a celebration of my time here on earth, and I encourage those who attend to come ready to have a good time. Party on! As always, thanks for reading, and I look forward to reading your thoughts.